Last night I lay awake as images that have been described on almost every news channel flashed through my mind. Graphics and visuals that have been described. Actual images of those reacting to the news. The memorials and pictures of the school itself. It's all too much for me to comprehend.
I'm not normally one to be so affected by what I hear on the news. Sure, I cry at sad things. I tear up with pride when a heroic story is described. But for some reason my mind is sitting at Sandy Hook Elementary School no matter what I do.
I wonder how long we will hear about this in the news. Hear about that one lost soul that destroyed so much so quickly. Put names with the faces of the innocent victims. Praise the heroics of those teachers that did what they are so gifted at doing. Is it wrong to not want to piece together every aspect of that fateful morning?
Is it wrong to want the news and other media sources to not focus on it? Is it wrong to expect the media to not turn this individual into an everyday household name? Is it wrong to want this tragedy to stay a tragedy and not a political jumping off point?
For me it's about remembering those who lost their lives doing what they do each and everyday. They led ordinary lives. They were mothers, daughters, sisters and friends. They were children barely old enough to even comprehend the fate they encountered. It's about keeping the family members and friends left behind in my prayers as they learn how to cope with this change in their life. The unexpected turn in the wrong direction.
As a nation we also must figure out how to deal with what happened in that small CN town. Honor those lost, not praise the one at fault and protect ourselves from such evils that unfortunately do exist.
My first step is to shut the TV off. Not watch every last rehashing. Hug my husband a little tighter and move on, move forward but not forget...